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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/28244208">firework kisses</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/mypage/pseuds/mypage'>mypage</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>NCT (Band)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Universe - College/University, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fireworks, Friends to Lovers, Holidays, M/M, Romance, Roommates</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-12-26</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-12-26</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-10 18:02:06</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>15,072</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/28244208</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/mypage/pseuds/mypage</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>He climbs up the ladder of the bunk bed, feeling around for Donghyuck’s blanket. Once he has it, he walks back to the living room and puts it over Donghyuck’s sleeping figure. Renjun turns on the air conditioning, then eats his store bought home cooked meal by his desk.</p><p>Donghyuck doesn’t wake up until tomorrow morning.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Huang Ren Jun/Lee Donghyuck | Haechan</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>11</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>244</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Collections:</b></td><td>the misfits' holiday exchange</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>firework kisses</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><ul class="associations">
      <li>For <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/users/ginafics/gifts">ginafics</a>.</li>



    </ul><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>for my prompter's prompt #1</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>It’s rare to see Donghyuck in one place at a time.</p><p>Renjun is used to his roommate being all over the place⏤in a good way. Donghyuck is always trying to juggle multiple things at once. He has to run the central student council, keep on track with his glee club activities and maintain his dean’s lister status. He is always trying to be in different places at the the same time, always busy and never having a moment to rest.</p><p>That is why Renjun is pleasantly surprised to see Donghyuck sleeping in their tiny living room. </p><p>Their small dorm room opens into their kitchenette to the side, with their one electric stove and their full-sized fridge. Their cupboards are full of instant noodles and bags of rice, and the fridge is full of leftovers from when they would cook and side dishes from when their parents would visit. They really have to clean it soon.</p><p>After the kitchenette is their study space, two study tables pushed on parallel sides of their walls. In the middle is a space where they set out their foldable table and some seat cushions for when they have friends over. There’s a television set pushed against the wall that separates their bedroom from their study space.  </p><p>Today however, instead of the usual foldable table, there’s Donghyuck sleeping on the floor.</p><p>Renjun stashes his bag on his desk, tip toeing around carefully so as to not disturb the sleeping Donghyuck. It must have been a tiring day for him.</p><p>He doesn’t know Donghyuck that well. They only became roommates this semester because of chance, and although he knows him through mutual friends, they haven’t really had the chance to sit down and get to know each other despite being roommates.</p><p>Donghyuck is always too busy, and Renjun likes spending his free time in the library or in the hole-in-the-wall cafes near the campus. The dorm is mostly empty during the day, only being filled with their presence during the night when it’s time to rest.</p><p>It’s still early, just in time for dinner, so Renjun hadn’t expected Donghyuck to be here. Donghyuck usually arrives at the dorm right before curfew, he’s always with some university organization or is studying out with friends. Renjun is more used to not having Donghyuck around.</p><p>But here he is anyway.</p><p>He walks past Donghyuck to their room. A small partition in the studio type apartment, and inside, there’s a bunk bed by the window. Renjun has the lower bunk and Donghyuck stays in the upper. He wonders how tired Donghyuck must have been to fall asleep on the floor.</p><p>He climbs up the ladder of the bunk bed, feeling around for Donghyuck’s blanket. Once he has it, he walks back to the living room and puts it over Donghyuck’s sleeping figure. Renjun turns on the air conditioning, then eats his store bought home cooked meal by his desk.</p><p>Donghyuck doesn’t wake up until tomorrow morning.</p><p> </p><p>Renjun stares at their electricity bill as he brushes his teeth.</p><p>It’s early morning, and he has a class at ten at the central laboratory. It’s about a fifteen minute walk from their dorm to the lab, so Renjun isn’t rushing.</p><p>And, as it seems, Donghyuck isn’t too.</p><p>Usually, Donghyuck would be out of the dorms by seven in the morning for an early morning meeting for the student council. However, he’s still here next to him, scrolling through his phone with the occasional exhales through his nose.</p><p>Renjun finishes brushing his teeth, wipes his mouth with the towel over his shoulder and turns to Donghyuck. “Have we paid the electricity bill this month?”</p><p>Donghyuck blinks up from his phone, curses under his breath and rushes over to the fridge where their electricity bill is being held up with a fridge magnet that Renjun got from Chenle as a souvenir when Chenle went to Disneyland for the previous summer vacation. </p><p>“Oh fuck,” Donghyuck says, grabbing the bill, “I forgot⏤shit sorry, so many things are going on right now. I’ll pay for it later after class.”</p><p>They split all the bills. From water, electricity and the internet⏤it’s Donghyuck that pays the bills usually and Renjun just hands over his percentage to him.   </p><p>“It’s okay.” Renjun says, taking the bill from Donghyuck’s hands. “I’ll pay it this time. I only have two classes today. I know you’re busy.”</p><p>Relief washes over Donghyuck’s features. “Thank you.”</p><p>Renjun shrugs, walking past Donghyuck and to their room. “That’s what roommates are for, right?”</p><p>“Right.”</p><p> </p><p>There's another anomaly today.</p><p>Donghyuck is working on his thesis at their dorm. And, yeah, fair⏤because it is his space too but again, Renjun isn't too used to having Donghyuck around.</p><p>So, he's trying to be mindful now as he talks to his thesis groupmate, Jaemin, over the phone.</p><p>Usually, it goes like this. He's screaming at Jaemin over the phone because Jaemin sent his part of the report late <em> again. </em>Don't get him wrong, Jaemin is really smart and really capable, but he just can't stand the fact that he believes in being fabulously late.</p><p>Sometimes, he'll tell Renjun to take things slow⏤that he's not living on the fast lane. But Renjun isn't like that, he wants things to be done a certain way and wants them done at a certain time. It keeps him stable, keeps him in check.</p><p>That's why here he is, on the phone with Jaemin while Donghyuck types into his thesis document. He's telling Jaemin to send him his part of the next chapter at exactly eight o'clock tonight and Jaemin, with his devil-may-care attitude, tells him he will.</p><p>Somehow, a part of Renjun doesn't fully believe that.</p><p>When he ends the call, Donghyuck is looking at him with an amused smile.</p><p>"What?" He asks, raising a brow as he slides his phone back into his pocket and walks to their fridge to grab himself a box of chocolate milk.</p><p>"I just... didn't know you can speak so colorfully."</p><p>Renjun laughs, settling back to his desk as he puts down the chocolate milk next to his laptop. "I'm always colorful. It's my groupmate, he's been pissing me off lately but he's really smart. Which makes it more annoying."</p><p>"I understand that. So many people are fully capable but you know... sometimes you just need them to do a little better." Donghyuck sighs wistfully, turning his chair so that he can work on his thesis again.</p><p>Renjun nods. "How's your thesis going?"</p><p>"Oh," Donghyuck sighs again, "fine, but⏤just... it's making me feel like I'm being pulled in different directions at once? That's why I've been spending more time here, I guess. So many people need me when I'm at campus. I just needed to find refuge for a bit."</p><p>Renjun pauses and watches Donghyuck's back, hunched over his laptop as he types while talking. He realizes that this is the first time Donghyuck has ever lamented about academics to him. Usually, it'll be joking complaints about their landlady, or about the spoiled food in the fridge. But he has never complained about studying.</p><p>It's a different side of Donghyuck that Renjun hasn't seen before.</p><p>"Well," Renjun begins, "I can't say I understand because I only have my thesis... but, hey, this dorm's your place too. Make a refuge out of it as much as you want."</p><p>Donghyuck straightens up, turns to him, and smiles. "If you wanted me around more, you could've just asked, Huang."</p><p>Laughing, Renjun tosses a piece of crumpled paper at Donghyuck. "You wish, it's <em> much </em> better if you're not here."</p><p>Donghyuck catches the piece of paper and grumbles. "You wound me, baby."</p><p>Renjun refuses to recognize the heat that brings to his cheeks, and turns to his thesis once more silently.</p><p>Donghyuck brings out his bluetooth speaker and plays a song Renjun doesn't recognize to fill the silence.</p><p>He makes a note in his laptop to remind himself to ask Donghyuck about the song title later.</p><p>(He doesn’t really get to ask, because Donghyuck posts it on his Instagram stories. Renjun adds it to his liked songs.)</p><p> </p><p>The last year of university is always full of nostalgia. When the seniors are not stressing over thesis and exams, they have time to reminisce. And for that matter, Renjun likes having walks in the campus by himself. Sometimes, he’s accompanied by his friends when he manages to rope them into walking with him. But most times, like tonight, he’s alone.</p><p>Whenever September starts to roll around, when the nights get longer and the temperature gets colder⏤the university starts preparing for the holiday season too. The campus trees are decorated with crawling lights, decorations are set up all over the campus and the university parks are filled with other students enjoying the holiday cheer.</p><p>Renjun really likes it. He only has two semesters left in the university, and with this semester coming to a close⏤he’s learning to treasure every second of his experience here no matter how much he wants to just get it over and done with. </p><p>In the middle of his trance and getting lost in the twinkling lights that complete the holiday cheer, someone jumps on his back⏤an instant piggy back ride.</p><p>His instinct causes him to topple forward slightly, grasping on the person’s arms to try and get them off them but when he hears the lilted laughter next to his ear⏤all of his nerves begin to calm down. </p><p>He’s even chuckling now, straightening up and hooking his arms under the person’s legs. “Lee Donghyuck?” He greets, turns his head a little to look at Donghyuck who likes as bright as ever⏤as if he didn’t go out of their dorm at 6AM today. “What are you doing?”</p><p>"What are <em> you </em>doing?" Donghyuck echoes him cheekily, hauling himself higher up on Renjun's back. "Why are you walking alone at night? What's got you thinking so hard?"</p><p>Renjun shakes his head and continues to walk like that with Donghyuck on his back. Donghyuck's not heavy, because he's balancing himself on Renjun's back too. In fact, it's even comfortable like this with Donghyuck's weight on him. "Nothing. I just like walking, is that so bad?"</p><p>He feels Donghyuck press his cheek against his shoulder for a moment, then digs his chin on the muscle that connects his neck and shoulder. It tickles a little, but Renjun keeps steady so that Donghyuck doesn't fall. "No. I don't like walking, you gonna carry me all the way to the dorms?"</p><p>At that, Renjun releases his hold on Donghyuck's legs, laughing. "No, get off me and walk."</p><p>Donghyuck lets his legs dangle on Renjun's side for a second, then hops off of him but not without looping their arms together. He doesn't exactly remember when he got this close with Donghyuck, but he likes it. He likes the certain comfort that Donghyuck brings. He concludes that it's because he associates him with the dorms and the warmth of his bed.</p><p>They walk the way to the dorms together, crossing the streets carefully and exiting the campus with their arms like that. It's been quiet, and he understands, it's the end of the day and they're both tired.</p><p>Halfway through, Donghyuck breaks the silence between them. "Are you not going to ask me about my day?"</p><p>So, he does, not minding the way Donghyuck leans his head against his shoulder. They're getting some stares and a lot of double takes from the people they pass by due to the public display of affection. Renjun's too tired to care. "How was your day?"</p><p>"I'm <em> glad </em>you asked." Donghyuck groans. "It's been horrible. I argued with a professor because he was being homophobic. Can you even imagine being homophobic in a classroom full of 40 liberals? Anyway, we all ate him up and I think he's going to get fired tomorrow. That is, if the dean's office gives in to peer pressure. I hope they do. They better do."</p><p>Renjun can imagine that⏤Donghyuck standing up in the middle of the professor's lecture to interject the discussion and oppose him. He hasn't known Donghyuck for a long time; but in the short period that he has known him, he can safely say that Donghyuck is confidently brave, an idealist with enough guts to take action so that his ideas come to life. He's not the central student council president for nothing.</p><p>It's one of the many things he likes about Donghyuck.</p><p>"Hope he gets fired then. I'm sure that the dean's office will hear you out?" He's heard things about their dean's office and Renjun is sure of one thing⏤they're very different from his college's dean's office.</p><p>They reach their dorm building, and they show the guards their access cards but it's not really a necessity anymore. They're familiar faces here, after all.</p><p>Donghyuck only pries himself way from him to show their access cards, then finds purchase in the crook of Renjun's arm again. "I hope so. I'm the dean's favorite student, there's no way she's not going to hear us out. Seriously, who even has the fucking balls to be homophobic in this day and age? I'll castrate him myself."</p><p>Renjun can't help but laugh at the brashness of Donghyuck's words, throwing his head back as the elevator door opens. As they step inside, Donghyuck tells him more about his day, about two of his student council staff arguing over something so inane.</p><p>When the elevator door closes and no one else steps inside, Donghyuck ends his story then turns to him. "Anyway, how was your day?"</p><p>Donghyuck is still attached to him even though they're a minute away from arriving in their tiny dorm room. Renjun inhales, thinks about his classes and his long day at the lab. He almost dropped a beaker and a micropipette but that's not really worth talking about.</p><p>He lets himself lean against Donghyuck too, the red numbers indicating the floor changing in front of them. "Definitely not as interesting as yours, I mixed chemicals and watched them get mixed by this loud machine."</p><p>Donghyuck makes a hum in the back of his throat, in perfect timing with the elevator door opening to their floor. "Well, then tell me all about it. I'm sure it's interesting."</p><p>He's sure that he'll bore Donghyuck out with it, but still, he tells him. "If you insist."</p><p> </p><p>Renjun has been studying a lot these days.</p><p>Other than the experimentation part of his thesis coming to a close this semester, there's also the finals that he has to worry about. For the most part of the semester, Renjun's quizzes have been fine. They aren't spectacularly high or remarkable⏤they're enough for him to pass and sometimes, it's enough for him to reach the curve. Which is more than enough to survive, really.</p><p>However, that doesn't mean that he can just <em> not </em>study for the finals. He wants to have good grades by the end of the semester, it's second to the last and he might as well work his butt off.</p><p>Sometimes, he studies with Jaemin so that it doubles as a discussion for their thesis but Jaemin is the kind of student that doesn't have to study. Somehow, in the middle of their study sessions, Jaemin always ends up asleep on the table next to him.</p><p>Jaemin as his study buddy cancels out. There's also Shotaro, whom he has befriended since first year, but their study habits are very conflicting so they don't work out that much. His classmates have also formed a huge study group but he doesn't work well studying in big groups. It's too much noise and too many opinions clashing together.</p><p>He almost gives up trying to find a study buddy, when Donghyuck proposes an idea that has never really crossed his mind until that Sunday afternoon.</p><p>He's making some ramen for lunch. Usually, his mom would drop by to give them side dish that can last them for an entire week but she has gone out of town for business purposes. They have to make do with what's left in the fridge.</p><p>Meanwhile, Donghyuck is on the floor, the television playing the latest episode of his favorite drama. Renjun's never really had the attention span to watch dramas, so he just watches it vicariously through Donghyuck's rants about the plot.</p><p>"We can study together." Donghyuck says as he eats peanut butter off the jar. "I mean," he swallows, then shoves another spoonful of peanut butter in his mouth, not even looking at him, "we do work well together when writing our thesis, right? And what's a more perfect place to study than in your own dorm room? You don't have to waste money in cafes or freeze your ass in the library."</p><p>Renjun cracks an egg into the pot of boiling ramen and stirs. He weighs his options; and Donghyuck makes perfect sense. There's just one thing he's worried about, though.</p><p>He turns the stove off and pours the ramen into two separate bowls. "Well," he begins, taking the bowls and placing it on the foldable stable in the middle of their dorm. Donghyuck mutters a small 'thank you' and helps him put it down steadily. "The one thing I'm worried about is that our beds are literally <em> right there. </em>We can end up sleeping instead of studying."</p><p>Donghyuck gets up from the floor to grab them a set of utensils, handing it to Renjun then settling back down on his space on the floor. "That's easy, we just have to make sure that we don't fall asleep."</p><p>Renjun laughs as he takes a spoonful of ramen soup. It's mildly spicy, just how he likes it. Donghyuck doesn't complain about it too so he thinks it's okay. "And how do you think we're going to do that? I'm not going to make you do something you don't want to."</p><p>The drama continues to play in the background of their conversation, but it's completely muted out to him. It makes for a nice white noise though, somehow completes the atmosphere even though he can't appreciate its plot or anything else about it for that matter.</p><p>Donghyuck takes another spoonful of peanut butter into his mouth, then a bite of the ramen. There's no way it tastes good, but Renjun doesn't question it. "We can bet on it? A bet's always good, right?"</p><p>Renjun isn't sure if it's going to work at all, but he's always up for a challenge so he doesn't back down. "Okay, what do you bet?"</p><p>Donghyuck seems to think about it for a moment. His eyes focus from the drama, to the bowl of noodles in front of him. "Whoever falls asleep first during a study session cooks lunch for an entire week?"</p><p>That does sound fair, but the stakes aren't high enough to keep them motivated. "No takeouts, no instant food, the lunch has to be made from scratch then? Loser has to go to the market and buy the ingredients too?"</p><p>"Hah," Donghyuck exhales, leans back on his palms smugly, "that sounds like a good bet." He reaches out his hand, calloused and rough. "Let's shake on it then?"</p><p>Renjun reaches out and holds his hand, it's not the first time he has done it. "Okay, the bet is on."</p><p> </p><p>Unsurprisingly, he studies even better when they have a wager. Something about the sense of competition drive the both of them to the edge, make them do their best until they reach their limits and on some days, they even push their limits.</p><p>He hasn't studied like this in so long.</p><p>They study hard, and only call the bet off when they have finished the day's agenda. It's cease fire then, because they have to rest too. So they sleep at the same time, wake up at the same time. It feels like all 24 hours of his day during the past couple of days have been spent with Donghyuck even though it's not the case at all.</p><p>He's not complaining, though. It's kind of refreshing to get to know Donghyuck like this. During the beginning of the semester, he thought that Donghyuck would be exactly like his old roommates⏤just passing by his life without making real connections other than the fact that they share a bathroom.</p><p>Almost a week after they began their bet, someone finally loses but there's no reason to celebrate at all.</p><p>Renjun comes home after an argument with Jaemin. These days, they bump heads less, but today they got a scolding from their thesis adviser which caused Renjun to blow up at Jaemin. Jaemin doesn't really talk back, which made Renjun even more agitated. But it turned out fine, because Jaemin apologized and Renjun did too. They just need to cut each other some slack. They only have one more semester left, anyway.</p><p>He's not only physically tired, but also mentally and emotionally tired but he still has to study with Donghyuck today. Maybe they can just study for two hours today and hit the hay. He can only hope that Donghyuck will agree, or he'll lose the bet just like that.</p><p>When he gets inside the dorm, Donghyuck is already there⏤their foldable table has been set out on the floor like it usually is for their study sessions. Their study tables have been abandoned for this bet, because they decided that it'll be easier to study when they're facing each other instead of having their backs to each other.</p><p>"You're studying already?" Renjun asks, taking his shoes off and putting them neatly to the side as he closes the door behind him. "Did you at least eat dinner?"</p><p>Donghyuck nods, fingers grasping at his hair as he looks at his opened notes. "I did a little bit with the student council."</p><p>That's good, they don't have to cook dinner tonight then. Jaemin has treated him to some burger and fries as a way to compensate for today's argument.</p><p>"Okay," Renjun says, settling his bag on his space at the table, "I'm going to go shower and we can start studying."</p><p>Donghyuck nods again, tightens his hold on his hair and Renjun notices it this time.</p><p>"Is everything alright?</p><p>It takes a while before Donghyuck replies, his shoulders deflating and arms falling on the table. When Donghyuck looks up at him, he can see it in his eyes that he's just <em> tired. </em>It's the kind of exhaustion that will only wear away with a long period of sleep.</p><p>Maybe they shouldn't study tonight.</p><p>"It's just... this thing at the student council was stressing me out the entire day, and then I had this report after and I butchered it.” Donghyuck explains, his voice dreary and rough from the day's exhaustion. His fingers fiddle with the pages of his books, flipping it to the next page to continue reading. "Just a tiring day, that's all."</p><p>Renjun sits down across Donghyuck now, focused solely on him this time. "Do you want to just sleep? We can call off the bet. You can't study well if you're not well rested, Donghyuck." He's speaking out of worry, and he only wants the best for Donghyuck.</p><p>However, Donghyuck is stubborn. He pushes, and pushes to the limit. If he hasn't reached or breached the limit, he's not going to stop.</p><p>So Renjun expects it when Donghyuck shakes his head. "No, we should study tonight. There's still so many chapters left." He says sleepily.</p><p>Renjun nods and pushes himself off the floor. "Okay, I'll make coffee and shower, then? How long do you want to study today?"</p><p>Donghyuck smiles, but it doesn't reach his eyes. It's a bit unsettling to see Donghyuck smile like that, someone who has always appeared to be the actual embodiment of the sun. But Donghyuck is only human, he isn't an infinite source of light and energy. He gets tired too. "For how long go can you go today?"</p><p>Clicking his tongue, Renjun laughs at Donghyuck's question. Ever since they've gotten closer, their humor has been weirder too. <em> All the innuendos, </em>he thinks. "Can you go for three hours or is that too much for you?"</p><p>That's enough for Donghyuck to throw his head back laughing. He doesn't think it's that funny, but maybe Donghyuck is too tired to even distinguish what's funny and what isn't anymore. Should he have said two hours instead?</p><p>"Oh baby, you know I can go longer than that. I have the stamina of a god."</p><p>Renjun rolls his eyes at Donghyuck, bites the insides of his cheeks to stop himself from smiling. He steps away from the table and to their small bedroom where their closet is to grab himself a change of clothes. "No, you don't."</p><p> </p><p>When Renjun gets out of the shower, hair dripping with droplets of water and a towel around his neck, he makes tea for him and Donghyuck. Donghyuck still looks exhausted, and Renjun is worried that he's going to pass out soon.</p><p>He knows that Donghyuck doesn't like being fawned over like an infant. So he doesn't prod further. Instead, Renjun only slides the tea cup over at Donghyuck's side, and pulls his study materials out of his bag to join the study materials that Donghyuck has already scattered over their table.</p><p>"I'll set up the timer." Donghyuck says, taking his phone underneath the pile of papers and setting their three hour timer. He puts it away again and brings his laptop closer to him, squinting his eyes at the screen.</p><p>Renjun does the same. He takes his laptop out and starts to go over the chapters that need to be done today. They've been pretty productive since studying together, so Renjun has little to no backlogs which is great. Biochemistry often has him swamped with readings, quizzes and reports but this routine he has managed to build with Donghyuck has helped him to get on top of his tasks.</p><p>"What have you done so far?" He asks Donghyuck, the low hum of their air conditioner filling their small room. They used to play music while studying, but they stopped when they realized that they just end up singing the song without actually studying.</p><p>"I'm done with Chapter 7, and I've also gone through my backlogs from last week. I think I might need help later, so can you quiz me?" Donghyuck asks. Even exhausted, Donghyuck is still on top of his game.</p><p>Renjun nods. "Okay, I'll quiz you later. I still have to go through my notes today. So, maybe, after that?"</p><p>"I'm fine with that. Thanks." Donghyuck says, and after that, not much is said between them.</p><p>Ever since he became friends with his roommate, their dorm has been louder⏤livelier. Jokes are always being thrown, they're always playfully fighting and Renjun has never had a roommate as bright as Donghyuck. But during their study sessions, it's always this quiet.</p><p>And it's okay, it helps him focus⏤helps him gets things done.</p><p>In the silence of their small dorm, Renjun can hear every sigh and every groan. Every change in breathing can be detected so when Donghyuck starts groaning about thirty minutes into their study session, Renjun looks up at him.</p><p>"Are you okay?"</p><p>Donghyuck is massaging his temples, blinking his eyes hard as he did so. "Headache."</p><p>"Do you want a painkiller?" Renjun asks, clicking his tongue. "I think I still have some? We can also stop here, if you want."</p><p>"I think I'll just take the painkiller? I really have to finish studying tonight." Donghyuck says with determination. Renjun doesn't fight him, so instead, he stands up from where he's sitting and grabs Donghyuck the medicine and a glass of water.</p><p>He watches Donghyuck carefully as he drinks the medicine down. "It might make you groggy though, so I think we should just call it a night, Hyuck."</p><p>Stubborn as he is, of course Donghyuck doesn't relent. "No, no. I can do it." He wipes his mouth with the back of his hand, grinning at Renjun now. "If you're sleepy, then go to sleep. You'll have to make lunch for the both of us for the week then."</p><p>That's exactly what Renjun expected from him. "Then, let's just call it off tonight? You can really sleep if you need to, Hyuck. I'ts fine by me."</p><p>"No." Donghyuck says sternly, a fire in his eyes that Renjun knows will not be backed down by anything. This time, Renjun relents. There's no use fighting fire with fire, and besides, it's only Donghyuck that he's worried about.</p><p>"Okay," he says, then thinks of it for a minute, "do you want me to give you a massage then? I'm good at it. I promise it'll help ease the headache before we continue studying."</p><p>Donghyuck drops his pen and chews on his lower lip. He's thinking about it. "And you will do it in exchange for what? That's suspicious. I'm not letting you win our bet, Injunnie."</p><p>Renjun laughs with his chest, rolling his eyes. "Nothing! I just want to help you, what if you don't finish the three hours? We can't have that, right? You don't want to lose."</p><p>Sighing, Donghyuck folds. Renjun can only imagine how Donghyuck must be feeling now. "Okay, I accept. But... only for ten minutes, and then we continue."</p><p>Renjun puts his things away then pats the space next to him for Donghyuck to crawl to. "Right. That will be enough, I have skillful hands you know?"</p><p>Donghyuck exhales through his nose, chuckling as he crawls over to Renjun's side of the room. Then, he lies down, head on Renjun's lap like it's the most natural thing in the world. Donghyuck closes his eyes when he lies down, and Renjun carefully pushes his hair away from his face.</p><p>Donghyuck looks peaceful like this, eyes closed with his hands folded over his stomach. The dim lighting of their dorm room casts a warm shadow on his face. It reminds him of the first time Renjun saw him napping in the middle of their living room, so unguarded and <em> rested. </em></p><p>He knows that Donghyuck doesn't need it, that Donghyuck doesn't need someone to look after him but when he looks like this⏤something throbs in Renjun's heart. That something craves for him to touch and care for him.</p><p>He wonders if it's normal to feel like this for your roommates.</p><p>He reaches out then, without thinking much, and lets his fingers work. He has had some experience, because his parents would always ask him to give them massages. Truthfully, he isn't sure if what he's doing is correct, but it has always eased the ache of his parents so he figures that it works.</p><p>Carefully, Renjun kneads Donghyuck's temples with his knuckles, applying enough pressure to ease the pain there. Donghyuck groans again, but it's different from the last time. It's almost as if he's relieved at the pressure being applied on his head.</p><p>For a minute, it's quiet, just Donghyuck's grunts heard through the room. Renjun presses his thumbs against the creases on Donghyuck's forehead, soothing them down until the tense muscles have relaxed. He hasn't heard a complaint from Donghyuck so he figures that he's doing well.</p><p>Then, Donghyuck asks him. "Are you going home for the break?"</p><p>The end of the semester means the nearing of the break, and it's only now that Renjun realizes that he might need to find a new roommate for the next semester. There's a part of him that wants to stay with Donghyuck, a part of him that wants to keep being around Donghyuck like this.</p><p>At this point, all Renjun can do is hope that Donghyuck feels the same. Maybe they can reach an agreement, even.</p><p>"Yeah, my parents want me to go back home for the break. My dad's coming home too it's like a family reunion. Are you?" Living apart from his family for years now, Renjun is used to the aloneness that it gives him. But it doesn't hurt to come back home for the holidays, and he truly does miss his parents even thought they always nag at him for not eating enough or not bringing home someone for the holidays.</p><p>Donghyuck chuckles appreciatively when Renjun presses harder on his temples. "Mhm, we have a family reunion too but I'm not looking forward to it because they're going to ask why I don't have a girlfriend yet, or if I plan on getting married after graduating."</p><p>Even Renjun can't help but laugh at that. "Me too, they keep asking if I'm going to bring someone home for the holidays. They've been asking since first year and now... we're almost graduating. I feel sorry for disappointing them."</p><p>Donghyuck laughs with him, and then it dies down to exchange for that comfortable silence again. Even with Donghyuck's eyes closed like this, he can see him thinking, pondering. He hopes he doesn't fall asleep though because it's going to be a blow on Donghyuck's ego⏤but he doesn't mind if Donghyuck falls asleep like this on him. "Graduation is so soon but it still feels so faraway." Donghyuck says wistfully after a moment.</p><p>"It is..." Renjun agrees, his fingers continuing the light ministrations. "It's amazing, isn't it? Time flies so fast. Can't believe we've been roommates for a whole semester."</p><p>Donghyuck nods on his lap, turning to his side away from Renjun so that he can use Renjun's thighs as his pillow. He's getting comfortable and Renjun is not going to stop him from falling asleep. Even though tomorrow he might be mad that he lost the bet, it's important that Donghyuck gets his rest tonight. "Hey, Renjun... what do you say... next semester, we stay as roommates?"</p><p>Well, Renjun isn't expecting that Donghyuck would offer it so bluntly. Then again, he has come to find that he and Donghyuck share a lot of things in common. He's glad that Donghyuck feels the same about continuing to room together. "That sounds good to me."</p><p>Renjun's fingers stop massaging Donghyuck's head now, and instead, he cards his fingers through his hair. Unconsciously, he even starts humming to an old lullaby he remembers from childhood. He doesn't sing, not anymore, but he finds it easy to let his guard down around Donghyuck.</p><p>He can see a hint of a smile on the side of Donghyuck's face as he hears Renjun's humming. He's snuggling further against him and Renjun knows that he's one second away from falling asleep. "Okay, roomie."</p><p>"Roomie." Renjun chuckles, and doesn't say anything much after that because a minute later, Donghyuck is snoring peacefully on his lap. For a split second, there's a thought that nags at him. It involves kissing the tip of Donghyuck's nose, kissing him goodnight solely because of how peaceful he looks like this with Renjun's hands in his hair.</p><p>Renjun shudders though, pushes those thoughts away and continues humming the lullaby that is as old as he is.</p><p>(Tomorrow, Donghyuck will begrudgingly go to the market to buy ingredients for their lunch. Renjun will tell him that they can just call the deal off but Donghyuck has always been a man of his words.)</p><p> </p><p>Studying hard science has quite <em> literally </em>made Renjun tough. He has let go of any and all academic achievement he had in high school. He graduated high school as a valedictorian with an outstanding achievement for being part of the choir that participated in national competitions. Now, though, he's just barely passing his classes.</p><p>And he's more than okay with that.</p><p>That's the most important thing about university for him. It's important that he passes, it's more than enough and if he ends up getting spectacular grades then he'll be proud of it. But now though, getting by is all he wants.</p><p>So when his finals come and go, he feels satisfied with what he has done. Renjun in high school would have wanted to get the highest grade in class, but the present Renjun is fine with just passing.</p><p>While he has developed this kind of mindset because of how difficult everything has been for him⏤he understands that not everyone can deal well with failure.</p><p>He understands it when Donghyuck comes back to their dorm, a second away from breaking down. He's in the most disarray he's ever seen him in. Donghyuck is always all over the place, but in the he has everything under control way, not like this⏤never like this where he looks like he's going to cry.</p><p>And when he sees Renjun in the room, standing by the sink as he washes the dishes from last night, it's enough to drive him to the breaking point.</p><p>"Renjun," he chokes out, meeting his eyes as he scrambles to take his shoes off to get to him. Donghyuck's eyes are red and watery, his hands trembling as he practically crashes against Renjun in a bone-crushing hug.</p><p>Renjun catches him in a heartbeat, arms outstretched and hands still wet from the dishes he's washing. He doesn't hesitate to envelope him in a warm hug and just <em> hold </em>him. He holds him tight, holds him and doesn't let go, holds him until Donghyuck starts sobbing into his shoulders.</p><p>Donghyuck doesn't cry, that's one thing that Renjun knows. Between them, it's him who gets sentimental about missing his family or about a movie they watched. Between them, it's Donghyuck who wipes his tears and teases him for having such shallow tears.</p><p>But Renjun holds him.</p><p>He pulls Donghyuck impossibly closer, until their bodies are flush against each other and until he's supporting all of Donghyuck's body weight. He consoles him, hand running circles on his back as he sobs hot tears into his shirt. With every sob that comes out of Donghyuck's chest, it tears down a piece of Renjun's heart with it.</p><p>Carefully, he soothes his hand down the back of Donghyuck's head, cradling him like a child against his chest as he cries his heart out. He wants so badly to ask what happened, but he knows that Donghyuck will tell him about it once he has calmed down, but for now, Renjun provides a shoulder for Donghyuck to cry on.</p><p>Minutes pass, and it feels like an hour has passed before Donghyuck has calmed down. Somehow, they've settled on the floor with Renjun leaning against their kitchen counter, and Donghyuck crowding him in with his limbs. He still has his face hidden in the crook of Renjun's shoulder but he isn't sobbing anymore.</p><p>Renjun's hands are continually running up and down Donghyuck's back in comforting strokes, waiting for him to talk, letting him know that he's just there and will wait for him until he's ready to discuss anything.</p><p>Or if he doesn't want to discuss it, that will be fine with him too.</p><p>Slowly, Donghyuck pries away from him, sniffling. Renjun lets go of him carefully, pulling away to look him in the eyes this time. Donghyuck's eyes are puffy, and he's positive that snot is running down his nose</p><p>When Donghyuck bursts out laughing as he wipes his nose with the back of his hand, Renjun procures the kitchen towel from their counter by reaching his hand up.</p><p>"Really?" Donghyuck asks, accepting the roll anyway. "A kitchen towel? What do you think of me?"</p><p>"It's the closest one, unless you want me to move?"</p><p>"No, stay like this." Donghyuck quickly shakes his head, wiping his nose with the rough material of the paper towel.</p><p>As Donghyuck wipes his face with the towel, Renjun runs his fingers through Donghyuck's hair. He flicks every strand back to their places, patting down any disarray and watching as Donghyuck gathers himself again.</p><p>It takes a minute, maybe more, before Donghyuck speaks again. "Are you free to talk about why I'm being a loser like this or do you have something else to do?"</p><p>Renjun laughs, throwing his head back in laughter that he almost hits his head against the counter. "I just spent almost an hour holding you as cry, do you think I have something better to do?"</p><p>"Fair enough." Donghyuck shrugs, blowing his nose on the towel, crumpling it and then tossing it to the side.</p><p>Renjun lets his hands fall to Donghyuck's shoulders, squeezing on the tense muscles there as Donghyuck begins to speak to him after crying. "I just got the results for my Pol 285 finals and... well... I fucking flunked it. Didn't even meet the fucking curve, Renjun."</p><p>His heart falls to his stomach at that news. He fully understands now why Donghyuck fell into his arms the moment he stepped inside the privacy of their dorms. He understands well now why Donghyuck is crying so hard like that.</p><p>In a word, Donghyuck is an achiever.</p><p>He's the central student council president, a constant dean's lister, and is part of the glee club too. He has so many things going on at once, and Renjun doesn't know how he manages everything. Donghyuck has always been the perfect image of a put-together student, someone who is always on top of his game, someone who can do no wrong because he is that capable.</p><p>It's almost as if the entire student body and faculty has put him on a pedestal. But at his very core, Donghyuck is very human. He has fears, has lapses and he is here in front of Renjun trying to deal with his biggest fear. He thinks this side of Donghyuck is the side he likes the most, the side that is afraid but courageous enough to strip away that mask. It’s </p><p>He cups Donghyuck's cheek, and Donghyuck leans against the touch. "Did you talk to the professor about it? He knows you're running for latin honors, right?"</p><p>Donghyuck closes his eyes. It reminds Donghyuck of the time he took a nap on his lap, but now though, there's chaos that lies beneath those eyelids.</p><p>"I did. He said that he can give me a removals exam for it along with some other classmates. He said that I shouldn't worry too much because my other grades for quizzes and assignments were high but still... I can't fail a finals exam. I don't fail the final exam, Renjun."</p><p>Donghyuck looks like he's about to cry again, the gravity of his situation still weighing him down. So Renjun squeezes his cheek⏤he squeezes until Donghyuck is smiling at him, batting his hand away from his cheek.</p><p>"And you won't. You will take that removals exam and get a higher grade this time. You're not going to fail, you're going to get latin honors and you're going to stay in the dean's list. I'm not letting you slip, Donghyuck." Renjun says confidently, his voice full of conviction and assurance. It's what Donghyuck needs, a constant force to keep him pushing, to keep him afloat in moments that he feels unstable on his feet.</p><p>And really, Renjun is willing to give him anything he needs.</p><p>Donghyuck grabs his wrist and nods. "Somehow, with you saying that, I can believe it."</p><p>"Of course, when did I ever let you down, Hyuck? We'll study tonight. Have you had lunch yet?" Renjun asks, pulling Donghyuck back up to his feet now.</p><p>"No," Donghyuck shakes his head, twining their fingers together. "Can we just order pizza?"</p><p>"Sure, pizza sounds good."</p><p>(Donghyuck takes the removal exams, passes it with flying colors. They have to wait until they release the grades to know if Donghyuck’s still part of the lit but he knows he is. Everything is good again, and Renjun has always believed he can do it.)</p><p> </p><p>After the final examinations, the university celebrates the holiday season with a concert and a pyromusical show. It's always been tradition, and it's always been one of the many things that Renjun has liked about the university. If there's one event that he attended religiously, it's this.</p><p>It's only this year though, that he realizes how much hard work goes into planning the event. Because as it turns out, it has always been the vague student council <em> thing </em> that Donghyuck always refers to and he doesn't want to spoil anything to Renjun hence he isn't really talking about it to him.</p><p>On top of surviving the final exams, Donghyuck also had to deal with such a big scale event. Every single day, Renjun finds something to admire.</p><p>It's the concert day, and it's being held inside their campus on the football field. Renjun has found himself hanging with Jeno and Yangyang, Donghyuck's friend group from his class, and Jaemin and Shotaro who wants to share the good spots that Donghyuck saved for them near the stage. He never imagined that this will be the group of people that he'll spend the holiday concert with but he's not complaining⏤he finds himself enjoying their presence despite the randomness of the combination.</p><p>The music is loud, and the band playing isn't unknown to him but he's now more immersed in a conversation with Yangyang while Jaemin gets into a light-hearted argument with Shotaro and Jeno about tonight's setlist.</p><p>Donghyuck promised to join them later before the headliner for tonight's show, and that's why he specifically asked them to stay together. He doesn't mind, because Jeno has kindly bought them free food and drinks, and he shares a lot of similarities with Yangyang than he can remember. He's on good terms with Jaemin now, and he can even call him one of his closest friends with how much they've gone through together because of their thesis. And well, he's always liked Shotaro.</p><p>"Do you guys know when Donghyuck will come?" He asks Yangyang and Jeno over the loud music. They’re his friends so Renjun assumes that he told them something. It’s not that he can’t stand being without him, he just wants to know if he’ll make it in time for the headliner as he has said before that they’re his favorite band. </p><p>Jeno answers him with a shrug. "I'm not really sure, he gets really busy during the concert and he usually comes out before they let the fireworks go off. I'm sure he'll be here, though. He's never missed the fireworks before."</p><p>Yangyang nods, grins at him teasingly. "Don't miss him too much, you'll just massage his ego."</p><p>"I don't miss him." Renjun denies vehemently, frowning as he takes his focus back to the band on stage.</p><p>They leave him alone after that. Is he that obvious? Perhaps he does miss Donghyuck. He hasn't seen him for the entire day and it's the longest that they've gone without seeing each other. Donghyuck has been out and about since early morning and he didn't even text Renjun to tell him that he has gone out.</p><p>Sure, they have the plans for the day and Donghyuck has briefed him a couple of days ago about the offer to save him a spot with his friends⏤but it doesn't hurt to communicate it to him personally, right?</p><p>Maybe he does miss Donghyuck, a little bit.</p><p>The concert goes by smoothly without any mishaps. Perhaps there's a vocalist that went off-key but the hype of the large crowd makes up for it anyway. Renjun likes going to concerts, likes live music, so he doesn't let Donghyuck's absence dampen his mood and stop him from enjoying the concert. After all, Donghyuck <em> did </em>save this spot for him. He should enjoy it while it lasts.</p><p>As the night deepens and more bands play, Renjun finds himself letting loose. Standing in the middle of a crowd, his problems and the load he bears lighten upon his shoulders. When he closes his eyes and lets the music course through him, his limbs moving to the beat, Renjun feels free.</p><p>He hasn’t felt this unrestricted in a long time.</p><p>Then, he’s dancing.</p><p>Next to him, his friends and Donghyuck’s friends are dancing too. Shotaro has an impromptu dance battle with Jeno and Jaemin is doing the shimmy with Yangyang. They’re all dancing differently, even though they’re dancing to one song. The only thing that they have in common is that they are laughing with their entire chests, the most relieved they’ve been for the entire semester. </p><p>The exams have passed, the grades have been encoded by their professors and they just have to wait for them to appear on the portal. Everything is up to the universe now, they’ve done their part and it’s now time to rest. It’s time to let go.</p><p>In the middle of the dance off and the music and the lights, there’s a voice that overwhelms everything. It's the voice that he has been waiting for all night, the only voice that he wants to hear despite having great singers perform right in front of him.</p><p>“Wow, Huang. Who knew you could dance?”</p><p>The world stops, the band continues but everything is halted in Renjun's point of view. His arms fall to his side, eyes opening at the sound of that voice.</p><p>Donghyuck stands in front of him, in a hoodie that covers his head and a utility belt around his hips. There's a radio hanging off of it, which Renjun assumes he uses to communicate with the rest of the student council while the event is on going. He doesn't look exhausted, and in fact, under the bright stage lights and Christmas lights, he looks even attractive smirking at Renjun like this.</p><p>"I do." Renjun says confidently, but before Donghyuck can even retaliate, Jeno has already pulled Donghyuck in for a hug. Yangyang has also joined their little group hug, the rock music in the background carrying the atmosphere that surrounded the newly formed friend group.</p><p>"I feel like we haven't seen you in years!" He overhears Jeno talking to Donghyuck. "You've been such a busy bee."</p><p>Of course, Donghyuck has been busy. Renjun is aware of this but he didn't know that it's to the point that Donghyuck has been missing in action with his friends too. His life is so busy, but he lives it so fully that Renjun can't help but admire him.</p><p>The list of things that Renjun admires Donghyuck for is only getting longer.</p><p>Donghyuck talks with Jeno and Yangyang for a while, and Renjun even gets to finally introduce his friends to him halfway through the current artist's setlist. After this performer will be the headliner, and then the fireworks. It's going to be absolutely magical in the next half hour.</p><p>Surprisingly, Donghyuck gets along with Jaemin despite the stories Renjun has told Donghyuck. He has also managed to befriend Shotaro in that short while. It makes Renjun wonder why they've never introduced their friend groups to each other. Seeing them mixing and interacting like this is a bit disconcerting, but in a way, it makes the perfect sense.</p><p>As the band on stage finishes their set, Donghyuck has managed to reach him through the crowd of their friends talking and dancing. The lights on stage are off, and the the hosts are running up the side to get the show hyped for the last artist of the night. Their friends aren't paying attention to the stage anymore, and Jaemin has sat down on the grass and the others soon follow after him.</p><p>Renjun though, remains standing, and there's a pair of arms that wrap around his middle from behind. It's electrifying, more electrifying than the music and the lights, there's something different about the way Donghyuck holds him tonight and Renjun can't quite put his tongue on it.</p><p>"What?" He whines, turning to find Donghyuck resting his chin on his shoulder, smiling dopily. "Aren't you supposed to be exhausted, Mr. President? What the hell are you smiling for?"</p><p>"Not tired anymore. I'm glad you can make it. Did Jeno and Yangyang give you a hard time?" Donghyuck asks, smiling even wider now.</p><p>He shakes his head, turns his attention back on the stage and pretends that he can't see Jaemin and Shotaro whispering to each other, definitely talking about them showing such intimacy in public.</p><p>"I actually enjoy their presence. They're cool, I don't understand why they're friends with you." He teases, this time, leaning back against Donghyuck's touch. He's aware of the number of couples around them, especially since the headliner is a band known for romantic love songs. It's the perfect concert to spend with a special someone⏤and it ends with a pyromusical show too. It can't get more romantic than this.</p><p>It's not like he has a romantic relationship with Donghyuck, right?</p><p>But why does it feel like there is something there?</p><p>"You're mean." Donghyuck whispers, digging his chin even more against Renjun's shoulder. He's silent for a while, the hosts on the stage are introducing the next artists and Renjun grabs Donghyuck's hands, holding them over his stomach.</p><p>"It's your favorite band next. Do you have to go back to work or can you just enjoy the concert this time?" He asks. He understands if Donghyuck has to go back to work, but he'll appreciate it if he can stay. He knows Donghyuck will hate to miss the show. And more importantly, he'll hate to watch the show without Donghyuck next to him.</p><p>That's something he has to admit now.</p><p>Donghyuck chuckles next to his ear, blowing air on it and he flinches away in instinct. Donghyuck only holds him tighter, though. "Work's over, time for me to enjoy the show. You're not getting rid of me for tonight, Huang."</p><p>"I was asking nicely, Lee." Renjun bites.</p><p>The argument doesn't proceed further, because Donghyuck presses his cheek against Renjun's shoulder with a smile on his lips. He knows their friends are watching the interaction, and maybe Jaemin will tease him a bit about it later when they're alone at the lab next semester but he's going to revel in it.</p><p>Perhaps, there's a part of him that likes being seen with Donghyuck like this.</p><p>He's not sure how long they stay together like that, arms around each other and basking in their shared warmth. But it's long enough for the hosts to finish their spiels, to introduce the next artists and for their friends to get back up on their feet for the next set.</p><p>Donghyuck parts from him, but stands next to him enough so that their arms are brushing against each other still. The lights dim on stage, and a spotlight takes everyone's attention. The first note plays, and the cheers of the crowd is deafening once they recognize the song. The lead vocalist puts everyone in absolute awe, and admittedly, their voice captivates Renjun too.</p><p><em> I want to lay down by the fire with you </em> <em><br/></em> <em> Where souls are glowing, ever warmer too </em> <em><br/></em> <em> Your love surrounds me like a lullaby </em> <em><br/></em> <em> Singing softly, you are mine oh mine </em></p><p>Renjun has never been in love. He has dated people in the past but the fire fizzles out as quickly as it starts. Nothing has ever lasted long enough for him to call it love. And that is okay, because Renjun hasn't really made it a priority or a goal to find love. But now, as Donghyuck coyly brushes the back of his hand against his own, as he takes their pinkies to intertwine together, Renjun wonders if it's okay for him to start thinking of Donghyuck like this.</p><p>The movement doesn't go unnoticed, and Renjun knows that it's intentional because of the way Donghyuck shifts closer to him in the guise of dancing to the music. He knows that Donghyuck means every movement, he means it when his fingers gain confidence, brushing along his knuckles before he interlocks their fingers. It's almost an olympic feat how Donghyuck does this seamlessly, all the while talking to their friends and dancing to the music.</p><p>Maybe it's only natural for him to hold Donghyuck's hand, too.</p><p><em> Moon has never glowed this color </em> <em><br/></em> <em> Hearts have never been this close </em> <em><br/></em> <em> I've never been more certain </em> <em><br/></em> <em> I will love you 'til we're old </em></p><p>Donghyuck's warmth on his hand is phenomenal. It's just holding hands in a crowd of people while listening to Donghyuck's favorite band, but something has definitely shifted in the air. There are butterflies in his stomach, a fluttering that he hasn't felt in a long while. There's a heat that skitters up from where Donghyuck touches him and up to his chest, a heat that is all-encompassing and powerful.</p><p>The thing is, he doesn't find himself being bothered about being burned alive by this heat. He doesn't mind it. He wants it to engulf him in flames until he erupts like tonight's firework show.</p><p>Donghyuck turns to him, a smile on his face, any and all exhaustion has been washed away. He's <em> just </em>Donghyuck now, not the student council president, not the dean's lister. He is just his roommate Donghyuck, the Donghyuck that he holds close to him on nights when he's too lazy to climb up on his top bunk, the Donghyuck that cries in his arms, the Donghyuck that dances in his underwear, the Donghyuck that cooks him lunch.</p><p>The Donghyuck that he is in <em>love</em> with.</p><p><em> Maybe the night holds a little hope for us, dear </em> <em><br/></em> <em> Maybe we might want to settle down, just be near </em> <em><br/></em> <em> Stay together here </em></p><p>"What are you smiling at?" He asks Donghyuck, the lights from the stage reflecting on his face.</p><p>This time, he knows then that it's not the shadow that casts over his face, he knows that it's nothing but the feelings in his chest that's making him see Donghyuck in this different light.</p><p>He likes it, likes it a lot. And truthfully, it's plenty terrifying, but with the firm hold Donghyuck has on his hand, there is no space for fear in his chest. There's just so much love, so much realization that it has always been meant to be⏤that the developing feelings is only the natural progression of their relationship.</p><p>As he takes Donghyuck's hand closer to him, slipping their interlocked hands in the pocket of his jacket, Renjun knows that Donghyuck feels it too. It's something unspoken that hangs in the air, something that is carried with the music, something that is felt in between the atomic space between their palms.</p><p>The night holds a little hope for them, and Renjun will cling to it until he has run out of it.</p><p>"I just like smiling at you, why?" Donghyuck answers cheekily, leaning forward until inches separate them. Renjun doesn't even care if his friends are watching, if strangers are judging them in their head for being too close or for being too intimate.</p><p>With Donghyuck this close, his non-farewell earlier in the morning is already forgiven.</p><p>"You're so annoying." Renjun teases light heartedly, pushing Donghyuck's face away with his other hand. It makes Donghyuck laugh, but it doesn't do much to deter him from coming closer into Renjun's personal space anyway. Renjun just lets him.</p><p>In the semester that he has gotten close to Donghyuck, he realizes just now how many things he lets Donghyuck get away with. He doesn't find himself minding it, though.</p><p>(He can even let him get away with his heart, in fact, he thinks Donghyuck already has.)</p><p> </p><p>Too soon, the set list ends but the feeling in Renjun's chest hasn't faded away. It remains there, and it grows even more as Donghyuck manages to wrap his arms around him again. The crowd has pushed a little during the set, and their group has been pushed forward against the barricade. It's harder to move around, so Donghyuck has caged Renjun with his arms. Somehow, despite being squeezed, it feels less claustrophobic when he has Donghyuck's arms around him.</p><p>"Fireworks next, right?" Renjun turns his head to look at Donghyuck, faces only an inch away from each other. Even in the cold air, Renjun can feel Donghyuck's breath brush past his ear. It sends a shudder down his spine.</p><p>Donghyuck nods. "I made sure it's spectacular for our last year. You better watch well, Injunnie."</p><p>The realization hits him, it is their last year at the university. It's the last year to make memories, the last year to attend the Christmas concert and the last year to watch the fireworks. The past years haven't really been meaningful to him, because there's always a next time and he hasn't been spending them with anyone special either. He mostly comes for the firework show each year. The next is always more captivating than the previous one.</p><p>But this year, it's their last one⏤as students, at least, and Renjun intends to make it the most captivating one so far.</p><p>They're smack-bang in the middle of the crowd, and they're close enough to the stage to make it feel like the sky is erupting in colors when the pyromusical starts. It'll hurt his neck a little, but Renjun knows that it's a sight that can't be exchange for anything. With Donghyuck practically wrapped around him, he knows that this moment can't be exchanged for anything <em> at all. </em></p><p>It's such luck that he has good memory, this one is saved for the rainy days.</p><p>The sky is completely dark, the stars absent as it seems to give way for the fireworks to take center stage. Renjun's thankful that it hasn't rained all night, a rarity during this season. Hence, it makes for the perfect view.</p><p>The music cascades from the speakers of the main stage, and Renjun can recognize it as a the starting verse of a Disney song.</p><p>The first firework shoots straight up, then erupts into a spiral of reds and oranges. Somehow, the falling of the sparks is in perfect sync with the crescendo of the music.</p><p>Another follows, and another⏤until the sky is filled with showers of flickering lights that seem to rain down on them from their perspective. Renjun can't help the smile on his face and the thrum of his heart, the excitement surging in him. He knows what fireworks are made out of, the chemicals in them, but that doesn't take the magic away from them. The crowd, and even Renjun, lets out gasps in ultimate awe of the show.</p><p>"It's beautiful, isn't it?!" He hears Donghyuck yell over the music and the booming of the firecrackers. He's right next to his ear, so he hears him plenty.</p><p>He turns around to face Donghyuck, and the blue and whites of the spiraling fireworks reflect on his eyes like a mirror. Renjun gets lost in them, and something in the back of his head is telling him to ask something⏤to put everything he's been pushing away into the forefront.</p><p>Can a moment be more perfect than this?</p><p>"It is beautiful." He says, but he's not looking at the fireworks anymore.</p><p>For a moment, Donghyuck tears his eyes away from the show. A moment is all Renjun needs, really.</p><p>"And <em> why </em>are you looking at me like that, Huang?" He can barely hear him through all the noise around them, there are people yelling, there's the loud music to accompany the show and the constant explosion of lights in the background.</p><p>There it is, the teasing question that doesn't really entail a serious answer. It's just one of their passing <em> things, </em>something that's not meant to be taken for anything other than banter.</p><p>But tonight, as the fireworks illuminate the sky with the tails falling down like waterfalls in an endless abyss, Renjun has an answer that he isn't sure if Donghyuck will take. It's an answer that can double as a question, too.</p><p>"I want to kiss you." He states, and the look that flashes across Donghyuck's features is definitely the most entertaining part of tonight's show. There's frenzy, confusion, and then⏤comes the realization.</p><p>He has never felt more relieved in his life. Even passing a class he barely managed to get through hasn't given him this kind of relief.</p><p>"Fuck," Donghyuck curses, he hears it loud and clear. "You just have to ask, baby."</p><p>This time, he turns around fully and catches a glimpse of Jaemin taking a video of the show, there's Yangyang cheering for the fireworks as if the moral support is going to make them shine brighter. Jeno and Shotaro are blocked from view, but he's certain that they're in the same levels of excitement too.</p><p>But he knows, out of them all, no one is more excited than him.</p><p>Donghyuck's hands rest on his waist as he reaches to place his arms around Donghyuck's neck. Someone pushes Donghyuck from behind, and it only nudges him closer to Renjun, their foreheads pressed against each other. He doesn't close his eyes though, not yet⏤he wants to savor this view for a second.</p><p>He inhales, then exhales, watches as Donghyuck smiles. "Can I kiss you?" </p><p>Donghyuck nods then, grips his waist a little tighter and pulls him in a little closer. "I've been waiting for you to ask that for ages."</p><p>"Then," Renjun swallows, throat dry and heart hammering in his chest. The fireworks are beautiful that is true, but nothing is more captivating than the way Donghyuck smiles at him and <em> looks </em>at him. He will always choose this view among any other thing that the universe can offer. "Let's not make you wait longer, shall we?"</p><p>"Unless you want to be evil, then make me wait longer." Donghyuck deadpans, and Renjun can feel him holding back the roll of his eyes.</p><p>He wants to kiss him so badly, that he doesn't even retaliate with words anymore.</p><p>Instead, he tightens his arms around his neck, just enough to pull him in and close the distance between them. He presses their lips together, just in time as another firework erupts and he's sure it looks beautiful, but he has closed his eyes and relished in the feeling of kissing Donghyuck for the first time.</p><p>Donghyuck kisses him gently, a hand cupping his cheek as the other travels down to rest above his hipbone. But Renjun has never been a gentle kisser, and he has waited far too long for this moment to take it slow.</p><p>He takes Donghyuck's bottom lip in his, tugging slightly before he surges forward again to press their lips together firmly. He hears a hint of a whine from the back of Donghyuck's throat, and he is trying his hardest not to let him know that his legs are jelly at this point. Donghyuck kisses him back as intensely, showing him how and what he feels about him.</p><p>Why did it take them so long?</p><p>He's never been one to call himself a romantic, but waiting until the annual university firework show to kiss Donghyuck sounds about the most romantic thing he's ever done in his entire life.</p><p>Then again, it could have happened whenever⏤it could have happened anywhere and it will still be as perfect. As long as kisses are shared with Donghyuck, he has confidence that it will always be perfect.</p><p>They kiss for a while, tugging and pulling just slightly because they have half the mind to remind themselves that they're in public. They only really pull away though when they hear their friends hooting, and he doesn't even have to look to know that all of them are filming this right now. ("I'm going to tell your mom!" He hears Jaemin jeer.)</p><p>Donghyuck laughs, head falling forward but draws him even impossibly closer. He's ignoring their friends to the best of their abilities. Renjun doesn't find that hard, he's really only looking at Donghyuck now.</p><p>"You're truly one of a kind, do you know that?" Donghyuck asks, offering him that lop-sided smile that shows his teeth. It's so charming that it hurts.</p><p>Renjun shrugs, a surge of confidence filling him once again. He hasn't read into things wrongly, after all. And from now on, everything is going to fall into place. "Of course. Who else will ask you to kiss them under a firework show?"</p><p>This time, Donghyuck rolls his eyes and answers resolutely. "I'm going to kiss you again."</p><p>He doesn't say no to that.</p><p> </p><p>i'm home :((<br/>gonna miss uuuuuuuuu<br/>:(((((((((((((( <em><br/></em> <b>DONGHYUCK 💖💘💞 [DEC. 19 9:14 AM]</b></p><p>I'm glad you arrived safely!<br/>You literally spent an hour this morning just lying on top of me.<br/>What do you mean? <em><br/></em> <b>YOU [DEC. 19 9:15 AM]</b></p><p>u knooooow what i mean :(<br/>it sucks!<br/>i've been wt u all day for a whole SEMESTER<br/>and suddenly bam no RENJUN<br/>unfair<br/>DONGHYUCKPHOBIA <em><br/></em> <b>DONGHYUCK 💖💘💞 [DEC. 19 9:16 AM]</b></p><p>Baby 😂😂<br/>It's only for a month.<br/>And it's a Christmas break too!<br/>You can go bother your siblings in the meantime.<br/><b>YOU [DEC. 19 9:18 AM]</b></p><p>yea i can do that<br/>but i dont want to<br/>ur the only one i want to bother<br/>what's not clicking babes<br/><b>DONGHYUCK 💖💘💞 [DEC. 19 9:20 AM]</b></p><p>I miss you too, you know that.<br/>But it's only for one month, babe.<br/>And then we can see each other again.<br/>I promise it'll be worth it when we meet again.<br/><b>YOU [DEC. 19 9:21 AM]</b></p><p>:(<br/>okay<br/>you promise to make the vacation bearable though?<br/><b>DONGHYUCK 💖💘💞 [DEC. 19 9:22 AM]</b></p><p>I promise.<br/>As long as you promise that to me too?<br/><b>YOU [DEC. 19 9:24 AM]</b></p><p>sorry my little sister was trying to make me watch shin chan<br/>like i'm gonna say no to that?<br/>Anyway.<br/>i promise :)<br/>it'll be a fun christmas, roomie.<br/><b>DONGHYUCK 💖💘💞 [DEC. 19 9:40 AM]</b></p><p>It's okay! Tell her I said hi.<br/>Wait.<br/>Roomie?<br/><b>YOU [DEC. 19 9:41 AM]</b></p><p>oh.<br/>hehe.<br/>boyfie.<br/>&lt;3<br/><b>DONGHYUCK 💖💘💞 [DEC. 19 9:41 AM]</b></p><p> </p><p>You free to call today?<br/><b>YOU [DEC. 21 8:51 PM]</b></p><p>ofc bby!!!!<br/>facetime in 30 mins?<br/>i wanna show u our christmas tree LOL<br/><b>DONGHYUCK 💖💘💞 [DEC. 21 8:51 PM]</b></p><p>Okay!<br/>I'll call you in 30 minutes.<br/><b>YOU [DEC. 21 8:52 PM]</b></p><p> </p><p>BABEEEEEE<br/>WAKE UP<br/>THEY RELEASED THE GRADES<br/>IM GONNA CRY<br/><b>DONGHYUCK 💖💘💞 [DEC. 23 7:12 AM]</b></p><p>Srory<br/>I jstu woke up<br/><b>YOU [DEC. 23 7:15 AM]</b></p><p>WAIT I'M GONNA CALL YOU<br/><b>DONGHYUCK 💖💘💞 [DEC. 23 7:12 AM]</b></p><p> </p><p>Merry Christmas, babe! This year went differently as I had planned. Of course, I just wanted to finish the experimentation part of our thesis without dunking my head in acid out of frustration and fortunately, it passed without any accidents. But another thing happened, you happened. You became my roommate this semester and everything changed for the better after that. Since I met you, life has been entirely different in the best way possible. I didn't think that I'd be with someone as bright, as beautiful, as kind and as loving as you. I don't really like being cheesy, but when it comes to you I somehow think that anything romantic is good. Fuck, I kissed you under a firework show, didn't I? You know that I am always here for you through whatever, and for as long as you allow me to be with you, I'll keep on sticking next to you. The thing is, you can't get rid of me quickly. So, you can't change your mind now!<br/><b>YOU [DEC. 25 12:00 AM]</b></p><p>Even if you weren't my boyfriend and even if we remained as roommates, I think life will still be as great. It's even better that you like me romantically and want to kiss me, though. So I can't really complain. It's a pity that we can't be together for Christmas this year, but I'm looking forward to spending the next years with you so I hope that we can make up for the distance next year.<br/><b>YOU [DEC. 25 12:00 AM]</b></p><p>It's Christmas, and all I can say is that, you're the best Christmas gift anyone can ask for.<br/>You're the best thing that's ever happened to me this year.<br/>And I just want to say.<br/>I love you.<br/><b>YOU [DEC. 25 12:00 AM]</b></p><p>BABE<br/>WHAT THE HELL<br/>I'M CRYING<br/>WHAT THE FUCK<br/>I'M GONNA CALL YOU<br/>I LOVE YOU WTF<br/><b>DONGHYUCK 💖💘💞 [DEC. 25 12:00 AM]</b></p><p> </p><p>i'm gonna send this early so that i beat u to it<br/>bc for christmas u had that speech and everything<br/>so i'm gonna send this before the clock strikes 12<br/>ok<br/>dont reply<br/>i'm not done typing<br/><b>DONGHYUCK 💖💘💞 [DEC. 31 11:57 PM]</b></p><p>happy new year babe!!! i really don't think i would have survived this year if not for you. you have been there with me through my highs and lows this year and even though we've only known each other for a short while, it feels like i've known you all my life. somehow, it feels like i was meant to love you. is that crazy? probably. but like you said, you can't get rid of me now. i truly feel like you are my soulmate. you understand me in ways i never thought people could see me. when i'm with you, everything is easy and everything is in place. it just feels RIGHT. you know? being with you, being next to you is the most certain thing in this world.<br/><b>DONGHYUCK 💖💘💞 [DEC. 31 11:58 PM]</b></p><p>and i know it's not always perfect, and life will always have challenges. we're graduating so soon and i regret not being able to know you sooner. but that's okay, because we'll have the next years of our life getting to know each other better, being with each other longer. next year, we'll be roommates again, but next year i hope you're ready for more cuddles and more kisses since you're not going to get rid of me. i'm really happy that i'm closing this year with you by my side and i'm even happier that i'm starting the next year with you too. it's going to be one hell of a ride, but i'm glad that it's with you.<br/><b>DONGHYUCK 💖💘💞 [DEC. 31 11:59 PM]</b></p><p>happy new year, babe!<br/>i hope you know i'm in love with you.<br/><b>DONGHYUCK 💖💘💞 [DEC. 31 11:59 PM</b></p><p>Babe.<br/>What the hell.<br/>I am in love with you too.<br/>Happy new year, baby. Answer my call, please.<br/><b>YOU [JAN. 1 12:00 AM]</b></p><p> </p><p>Starting the new semester with a new set of classes, new professors and well... a new boyfriend⏤everything just seems to be looking up for Renjun. If last year their dorm was void of any decorations when they first moved in, it's entirely different this time.</p><p>Their walls that used to be bare are now littered with polaroid pictures and even frames of their photographs together. They can't do much with the bunk bed because it's their land lord's property, so instead, they bought a floor bed which they can roll out in the living room if they ever want to sleep next to each other (which happens <em> very </em>often.)</p><p>Renjun's mom, after learning that his roommate is now his boyfriend, has bought new pillows for them.</p><p>("Do they think we're newly weds or something?" Donghyuck jokes when Renjun explains why he's hauling so many things the day they got back on campus.)</p><p>Though, Donghyuck's parents aren't to be bested, they made an extra tub of kimchi and even gifted them matching house slippers for the season. It's just too amusing, and he's really glad that their parents are accepting of something that's so sudden.</p><p>Even if the announcement of their relationship is sudden and even if the month they had away from each other has been challenging, Renjun finds it easier than he expected.</p><p>The only thing that changed now between them is that he can kiss Donghyuck whenever he wants. The only thing that changed now is that instead of bets on who's cooking lunch, they can have kisses as rewards if they finish a study session. Sometimes, they'd spend mornings lazily kissing on their thin mattress and rush getting ready for their classes because they got too caught up in the moment. These changes are small, but impacts him greatly⏤and the best thing is that, they're all for the better.</p><p>With this semester being their last, they both have less classes now and most of their time has been devoted to thesis writing and attending seminars for graduation requirements. Donghyuck still has student council duties, but they're lighter on him now too.</p><p>Everything is falling into place, he comes home to a loving boyfriend in a place that they can call their own. It's good, everything is good. He hopes that it continues like this for the rest of the semester, at least until he defends his thesis.</p><p>For now though, as Donghyuck makes kimchi-jeon for dinner while dancing to Kai's new song, he enjoys the tranquility he has with his boyfriend.</p><p> </p><p>On their free days and when they're too lazy to cook lunch, Renjun and Donghyuck like to eat out.</p><p>Some days they'll settle for fast food, some days they'll get a delivery⏤but most days, they go here.</p><p><em> Here </em>is a hole-in-the-wall eatery that's about a ten minute walk away from their block. They serve homecooked food, warm and hearty even for a low price. The most special part about it is that all of their staff are very welcoming grandmothers.</p><p>As someone who grew up with his grandparents, when Renjun first discovered the eatery on his first year after failing a quiz, the hospitality in the small restaurant almost made him sob. The food and the people reminded him so much of home. It's no question that he has dragged Donghyuck here too to share that comfort with him.</p><p>There's one thing too, when Renjun drags Donghyuck to this place with him, it's a tell-tale sign that something is bothering him.</p><p>So, once they have their food in front of them, Donghyuck begins to ask the questions.</p><p>"You okay, babe?" Donghyuck asks carefully, handing him his utensils. "I mean, you suggested the place so I thought..."</p><p>Renjun smiles, takes the utensils from Donghyuck and starts to dig into his own food. "I'm okay. It's just, thesis has been stressing me out recently so I thought we can relax for a bit here? I missed their food during the break too."</p><p>"Okay," Donghyuck nods, taking that as an explanation. Under the table, he shifts so that their knees brush against each other. "How's thesis going? Is Jaemin still being a pain in the ass?"</p><p>He laughs, shaking his head as he takes another spoonful of rice. "He's been very cooperative recently, but defense is a month away and our adviser still has a lot of major revisions. It's been stressful this week, and we've only been doing this semester for two weeks, god."</p><p>Donghyuck puts a piece of meat on his plate, then locks their ankles together under the table. Renjun tries to bite down his smile, chewing his food. "Is there any way that I can help? Let me know if you want me to proofread it for you, babe. I'm free this semester."</p><p>His heart swells at the offer. He knows that Donghyuck has his own things, and that he's busy as is too, so the offer means a lot to him. But he thinks he and Jaemin can handle it, at least for now. Renjun reaches over the table, holds Donghyuck's hand and locks eyes with him. When Donghyuck looks at him, he can see the worry and care he has in those pupils.</p><p>(He wonders if he'll ever be loved like this again.)</p><p>"It's fine, babe. I think we can handle it. But if we need back up, I'll let you know."</p><p>Donghyuck nods, bring his knuckles against his lips. "I'm always here for you, babe. But the soup is getting cold, let's eat, yeah?"</p><p>"Yeah."</p><p> </p><p>The clock on his study table says it's 3 o'clock. His eyes are burning as he stares at their thesis document, there's a tiny cursor that says Jaemin is still working on it too but Renjun is on the brink of a breakdown.</p><p>Everything should be under control, everything should be going smoothly now because they've passed the hardest part of pulling off the experimentation. He just didn't know that writing the manuscript is this hard. He can't count the number of revisions they've submitted and how many sheets of papers they've gone through because of their adviser's corrections. He keeps trying <em> and </em>trying but it all seems futile.</p><p>At 3AM, with the heavy pressure on his shoulders because this is the most important requirement for graduation, it's so easy to lose hope.</p><p>The light flicks on, and he hears shuffling from behind him. Renjun screws his eyes shut, rubs the hot tears away from them with his fists and turns to look at Donghyuck.</p><p>Donghyuck's half asleep, his hair strands flying everywhere and he has his hand under his shirt. Did he make too much noise? Did Renjun wake him up?</p><p>"Baby?" Donghyuck asks, voice rough as he trudges the way from their bedroom to their tiny living room where Renjun is hunched over his laptop. "You're still awake?"</p><p>Renjun clears his throat and sniffles. "Yeah, did I wake you up? I'm still finalizing the manuscript."</p><p>Donghyuck pulls a chair, places it next to Renjun before proceeding to sit next to him. Wordlessly, Donghyuck takes his hands in his own, caging them inside his own. "It's 3AM, baby. You should rest for the day. Don't you have an 8AM later?"</p><p>It takes all of his will to not fall apart in front of Donghyuck like this. He's used to being the one to provide comfort, used to being the strong one and used to being the one holding Donghyuck as he cries. Today though, with the weight of the world weighing him down, it's so easy to just fall apart in Donghyuck's hold.</p><p>"I do." He says, swallowing down the lump in his throat. "But the deadline for the final revision of our manuscript is at 6PM today and we still have to submit it to our adviser first thing in the morning. There's still so much to do."</p><p>Donghyuck inhales sharply, draws Renjun's chair closer to his own until he has his knees caged inside his thighs too. He glances at the open document on Renjun's laptop screen for a few seconds, before turning to him with a frown.</p><p>"Jaemin's cursor has been blinking on that one comma. I think he has fallen asleep. It's time you rest too, baby. And later, you'll have more energy to work on the manuscript and submit it." Donghyuck tells him, soothing his hand over his knuckles as the other cups his cheek.</p><p>Donghyuck's warmth is so comforting, and the singular touch almost lulls him to sleep. He wants to fight it, fight his exhaustion and finish everything that needs to be done today⏤but Donghyuck is here, warm and inviting, and is asking him to go to sleep. It's really hard to say no to him.</p><p>"But I don't have enough time, Donghyuck. If I sleep, I won't have enough time and I still have to communicate with Jaemin too. If I can't reach him, I'm gonna have to finish everything tonight⏤"</p><p>"Baby," Donghyuck calls out to him sternly, squeezes where his hand is resting on his cheek. Renjun opens his eyes and meets with Donghyuck's intense gaze. "You, of all people, should know this. You taught me this, didn't you? You have to rest, you have to take care of yourself or else I'm going to do it for you. Better believe I'll physically get you in bed with me if I have to."</p><p>Renjun smiles weakly, holds Donghyuck's wrist and sighs. "I'll sleep, but you have to wake me up in three hours. Is that a good deal?"</p><p>Donghyuck, satisfied, smiles and kisses his cheek. "Sounds fine to me, come here and be my little spoon."</p><p>After that, Donghyuck doesn't waste any more time. He shuts down Renjun's laptop without letting go of his hand, then grabs him to bed with him. The bottom bunk of their bed is small, but they've cuddle on it enough times to find their space and position easily. With Donghyuck's arms and legs holding him in place, his steady breathing fanning against his chest, and his warmth encompassing him⏤it's so easy to forget about his problems and just rest.</p><p>With a kiss to the base of his nape and a small 'good night' from Donghyuck, Renjun finally allows his exhaustion to catch up to him.</p><p> </p><p>On the day of his defense, Renjun wakes up completely on edge.</p><p>It's thankful that Donghyuck doesn't have a morning class on Fridays this semester⏤because he truly doesn't think he could go through this day without Donghyuck next to him, calming him down.</p><p>He would have preferred it if the defense is a private matter, but students can come into the room and watch him defend his thesis with Jaemin. He doesn't think he has a fear of public speaking, he just has a fear of miserably failing this entire thing. He's worked so long and so hard for this that he can't bear the thought of flunking the defense.</p><p>It makes him so fucking anxious that he feels like he's going to throw up, that is if his soul doesn't leave his body first.</p><p>They're going to be defending their thesis in thirty minutes, and Jaemin is walking back and forth in the hallway rereading through the manuscript once again while Donghyuck sits next to him, doing his tie as they have dressed up in a nice three-piece suit because apparently the way they dressed has an impact on the grades, too.</p><p>"I can smell your success already, babe. You look so handsome like this." Donghyuck jokes, a smile tugging his lips as he pats down Renjun's necktie upon his chest. "God, you'll walk into the room and wow your panelists. They'll give you a perfect score right there and then."</p><p>Renjun laughs at him, shaking his nerves. Donghyuck's joking nature is helping alleviate his anxiety and he can't be more thankful. "That's not how it works, you know?"</p><p>Donghyuck shrugs. "Don't care, you look good and you're smart and sexy so that's enough for me to pass you, really."</p><p>"Oh, what I'd do for you to be my panelist." Renjun says sarcastically, poking at his stomach and Donghyuck lurches forward, holding his stomach dramatically with his head resting on Renjun's shoulder.</p><p>"You hurt me, you can't hurt your panelists you know?"</p><p>They exchange banter like that until their names are called for the defense. Renjun inhales then exhales, and with Donghyuck holding his hand, he steps into the defense room with his head held high.</p><p> </p><p>"Congratulations Mr. Huang and Mr. Na. The manuscript was well written, the graphs were properly labelled and the citations were perfect. The presentation is spectacular as well. I'd love to see you expound on this topic, so it'll be lovely if either of you can sign up for our master's program after graduation."</p><p>Renjun never thought that a simple congratulatory response to their presentation can make him so emotional. He's smiling so hard, standing in front of the panelists and in front of the other students with Jaemin next to him. The defense is a success, the panelists loved it, and they were able to answer all questions relevant to the topic.</p><p>He hears applause from the crowd, people congratulating them as they take down their setup and proceed to the back so that the next presenters can take the stage. He bows his head as he walks past the students and the panelists, and finds the one person in the crowd that he wants to be with.</p><p>There's Donghyuck, clapping his hands as they approach him. Needless to say, he envelopes Donghyuck in the most bone crushing hug. He assumes that Donghyuck gives Jaemin a high five, but he doesn't let Donghyuck go for a long while.</p><p>"You did a good job, baby. I'm so proud of you." Donghyuck says, and he can feel him patting the back of his head. "Don't cry or else you're going to make me cry and it's not a good look for the both of us."</p><p>Renjun pulls away, remembers where they are and who they are around so he maintains a respectable distance from Donghyuck but he holds his hand in exchange for the. He knows people are looking at them, and the next presenters are going to start in a few minutes, but he doesn't care.</p><p>The worst part is over now.</p><p>It's only going to be good things from here, for real this time.</p><p>"Thank you for being with me." He says, voice barely above a whisper as he smiles at Donghyuck.</p><p>True to his character, Donghyuck smirks and winks at him. "Anytime, baby. You'll always have me."</p><p>He wants to kiss Donghyuck so bad, really, but Jaemin gets in between them and groans.</p><p>"Is the love fest over, guys? I really want to drink right now, I don't care if it's morning. Call Shotaro, Yangyang and Jeno. Let's get fucking wasted! My treat!"</p><p>They erupt into laughter then, ushering themselves out of the defense room but not before submitting their final manuscript to their adviser. Donghyuck phones their friends as they walk out of the building, Jaemin cheering as he runs ahead of them. Donghyuck is holding him by the waist as he presses his phone to his ear with his other hand, yelling at Jeno to get his ass up so they can go drinking.</p><p>
  <em> The worst part is over now. </em>
</p><p>There's still the exams left, still requirements to submit. There's still the actual graduation ceremony left, there's still the rest of their lives to live out and the rest of the world to see but for now, the worst part is over.</p><p>With Donghyuck next to him like this, Renjun is excited at the prospect of having Donghyuck there with him as he goes through all the obstacles life may have in store for him. Everything is so uncertain, and the possibilities are endless, but Renjun knows that Donghyuck will be here with him for the ride. And he too, will be there next to him, as long as he lets him be with him. </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>happy holidays!! :')) writing this fic made me a little bit emo... bcz i too, projected a bit on the prompt... nevertheless, i hope u enjoy this!! thank u to everyone who participated on the exchange, ur all so sexy and wonderful mwah</p></blockquote></div></div>
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